krupuk

So much stuff I collect

2010-09-19T15:17:00.000+07:00

Have all these stuff filling in my home space. I just learn how to organize them. Imagine having collecting lots of stuff but you don't have any system to store it. Yup, that's me alright...

I like to collect stuff and believe me there are a lots of stuff I like to collect. From busway tickets, postcards, movie posters, stickers, you name it. All that stuff you just get without even try... I'm afraid I might have some sort of compulsive hoarding problem. That's why I determent to put an end to it. My husband Beng is the one really support me on this since the very beginning. That's why we put together a garage sale, something we might want to do regularly to get rid of our stuff to the other who might need them more than us.

I also start to a new attitude towards my stuff, slowly but sure, I throw away stuff. It's not really easy, not because I don't want to throw it away, it's more because I don't have enough time to take care of the matters on a regular based. Anyway, at least now I try to be more organized with my stuff.

There you go, a confession in the middle of hot-no rain-sunny afternoon during the rain season Jakarta...

lulu, at home, 15.07 wib, 19 September 2010

Ramadhan and everything else around it

2010-08-12T12:13:00.000+07:00

Here I am, several months later after my writing about the new year of 2010. It's Ramadhan fasting month now. Everything seems to be the same but also different. So many things had happen during this global warming era. Natural disaster and non natural disaster are happening side by side now in my country. The earthquake and how one party repressing another on behalf of whatever excuse they could find. Unbelievable. I feel like Ramadhan it's not special anymore, because the way things happened during the first day of fasting month yesterday. I couldn't have the heart to talk about it here. Maybe it's God's will to test our patience, especially during Ramadhan, for those who experienced it or us who became the witness.

I may have not been a very religious kind of person. But I feel I should pray to God. Pray for others, pray for all of us, that something good would come out of it, no matter how bad the situation appearing now.

Amien...

lulu, cikini office, Jakarta, 12.11 wib, 12 August 2010

New Year 2010

2010-01-03T10:56:00.002+07:00

Another year has gone by
I walk alone in my dream
walking on the beach of hope
to find your smile
to feel your smell
longing is equal with finding your love again
with new perspective through the same eyes
as the new year is coming by

lulu, at home, 10.02 wib, 3 January 2010

Take this Facebook out of me

2009-04-22T07:11:00.002+07:00

Yes, I admit it. I wrote most of my notes on Facebook now. Of course it's in Bahasa Indonesia. But I don't really know if anybody really read my stuff here. Feel like talking to myself...and maybe the universe of virtual world hahaha...

Just quick update: so many things are happening right now. I'm writing a book about my film festival experience for the last 10 years. Am working also to support V Film Festival right now (it's a women international film festival, 21-26 April in Jakarta). Maybe start working for the European Film Festival 2009 soon.

I'm trying my best not to attach myself too much on Facebook, but in my line of work, information flow is really important and everybody's using FB now. Try to limit it by reading all the messages and everything else through the notifications they sent to my email. This way, I could just ignore the one that is not really important since FB also take a lots lots of time to open now.

Anyway, no promisses this time. Try my best to leave something behind in this blog more often.

lulu, at home, 07.20 wib, 22 April 2009: Happy Earth Day!

My blog and my life

2009-02-01T21:32:00.002+07:00

Yes, it's been a while. Now I am in the middle of writing a book about my experience in the last decade. So you can see how I don't have time for this blog. But I will try to keep posting my poem here. So I will just dedicate this blog for my poetry.

My life has been full of unexpected experiences. After organized the second European Film Festival "Europe On Screen" last October, I went to Jogja to host 12 people from US + 14 from Sulawesi and Kalimantan islands last December. Then got this invitation to become a jury member for a new short film festival in Sri Lanka so I went there. I celebrated the New Year's Eve 2008-2009 in the very quiet and almost empty Colombo's airport on my way back to Jakarta. What an experience!

It could only matched to my experience celebrating New Year's Eve 2001-2002 in Freiburg, Germany. It was the momment the Germans had to change their currency from Mark to Euro. How people there need more time to pay or give small change cause they were still try to recognize the new Euro money. What a sight!

Anyway, now I'm trying to re-organize my life during the first month of 2009. Hope I can keep doing it until it's really organized. Maybe then I can have more time for this blog...

lulu, at home, 21.44, February 1, 2009

Menghitung Hari

2008-11-22T16:48:00.002+07:00

setiap hari adalah baru bagimu
setiap hari adalah aku melepas diriku
setiap hari adalah perjalanan haru

setiap hari kutemukan kasihmu tanpa pamrih
setiap hari aku berharap hari tak pernah berakhir
setiap hari aku berdoa untuk tidak pernah meninggalkanmu lagi

lulu, for my brother, AMKH Singapore, 22.00, 17 Nov 2008

to be grateful is something you should share...

2008-11-07T22:04:00.003+07:00

I know, it's been a while... But I never knew anyone visiting this blog except for 1 or 2 people.

The time I spent in front of online computer is almost the same like before, so three email addresses, one friendster and one facebook are keeping me busy. Not to mention my offline time: film festival, watching movie in the cinema, meeting new people almost every week,... you know, living your life.

Of course when my brother got sick and moved in to the hospital almost 2 months ago, I became even more busy. Trying to hold on to what I am, my work and my world, while entering a new world, my brother's. I never knew before so many people really care for him as if they're his close family. Not to mention the 'infotainment' scene (sort of the gossip shows on TV) that me and my family have gone through as part of my brother's world.

I am grateful with his condition now. His recovery is really fast considering his sickness situation, thank God for that. At the same time I realize that it has been tough on my side and I would never survive this without the support of my husband Beng. So yes, I am grateful with my life. And to share this with all of you, wherever & whoever you are, is really an honour for me.

Thank you all for reading this...

lulu, at home, 22.23 wib, Nov 7, 2008

6 Days

2008-10-06T08:33:00.001+07:00

6 days in 36 years
slowly vanish as the flight take off
will always remember
how you touch me
in a blink of an eye

lulu, for one and only brother
(in the flight Singapore-Jakarta, 3 Oct 2008)

So Many things had happened for the last 5 months

2008-05-08T08:21:00.002+07:00

I know... it's been a long time since my blog up dated. But will start again. This time with a lot more pictures. But now I'm in a hurry to a morning meeting, hope to catch up with you soon.

lulu, 8.23 wib, 8 May 2008,

What is the 'New Year' mean?

2008-01-01T17:18:00.000+07:00

Today is a new year's day. Heavy rain causing flood and global warming causing flood tide have been happening all over Indonesia, welcoming the year 2008. So 'New Year' for me means being thankful to God that I am well, together with my husband in our small home.

Well maybe I saw some fireworks at 12 midnight from my roof and watched the news showed all these crazy people celebrated the New Year's Eve anyway under heavy rain with endless traffic jam in the centre of Jakarta. I can understand how hard life of Jakarta and all this natural disasters drove people to forget for once and just having fun by celebrating the New Year's Eve.

What I just don't understand is how I can be living my life and move on while lots of people in my country living under simple refugee tents, waiting for the flood to disssappear with the heavy rain keeps coming and coming. It is hard just to comment and critisize the government, blaming them with all these problems. Just as hard as knowing you can not do anything about it simply because you have your own life to take care of and you are not in the strategic position to turn things around.

And that what is the 'New Year' mean to me...

lulu, at home, Jakarta, 17.40, January 1, 2008

Time Counting

2007-12-10T16:05:00.000+07:00

3 hours drive from Palu
there is Ngata Toro
1 hour walk from Ngata Toro
there is Pono

hundereds kilometres from here
there is you

lulu, for my Beng, somewhere in Central Sulawesi, 2 December 2007

Soliter

2007-11-15T15:32:00.000+07:00

sepi mengayun pun melamun
membangun canda yang tersendat
ah, hanya mimpi di sore yang mendung
aku terkesiap ditampar guntur yang menggelegar

lulu. goethe-institut jakarta, 15.37 wib, 15 November 2007

My Medan & Aceh exprience

2007-11-11T17:38:00.000+07:00

I've been working for Europe On Screen 2007 for the last 7 months and now I finally at the 8th months. We finished the main event in Jakarta and the cities after: Bandung & Medan. I have to travel to Medan & Aceh (the fourth city) to bring the films and give an opening introduction.

I never been in Medan & Aceh before so it's my first time. Medan is so chaos that reminded me a little bit like Jakarta a few years ago (Jakarta is now in the next level of the term "chaos"). I'd been dreaming of Medan for 10 years. It was quiet overwhelmed when I was finally there. But I still feel it is a city I only visited for 3 days and nothing more.

I'm in Aceh now, meeting friends I only met when they were visiting Jakarta. Suddenly I feel at home. It is just amazing how things are going on now in Aceh. So many foreigners, working for NGOs all over Aceh. People here are struggling to make sense out of the drastic changing in their land. After the tsunami, not just they have to regret everything that got lost but also live everyday with the post-tsunami effect in their way of thinking and living.

I'm in Aceh now and I find out what is lost from the spotlight of Indonesian media. I feel lucky that I am here now instead of months after tsunami which is as hard as anybody could ever imagine it would be. The fact that I bring some films as part of Europe On Screen will be the most precious experience than any of my traveling film festival experience.

lulu, Episentrum, Ulee Kareng - Banda Aceh, 17.54, November 11, 2007

Banda Aceh Suatu Hari

2007-11-11T17:35:00.000+07:00

Siang aku tiba bersama gerimis
Aceh menyapaku lewat kesombongan kaum pendatang
Malam jatuh bersama hujan
Aceh menyapaku dengan obrolan seru tanpa henti-henti
Pagi pun tiba mendesak aku bangun
Aceh tersenyum mendung dalam bingkai jendela hotel

lulu, 07:29 wib, 11 November 2007

my simple point of view

2007-09-09T22:12:00.000+07:00

Finally the sunny day... with a few drops of rain
I walk and talk to my inner self
I release all enemy within me
I run and forget the past
I'm on my knees and pray

I am living my life
just like everybody else...

lulu, at home, 22.22, September 9, 2007

Seperti waktu

2007-08-28T17:15:00.000+07:00

seperti siang aku merindu malam
seperti malam aku songsong pagi
seperti hidup aku mencium harum
seperti normal aku hidup sendiri

sepertinya aku hanya menunggu
saat hari membawa pulang kamu

lulu, goethe-institut jakarta, 17.19 wib, 28 Agustus 2007

Puisi-Puisi SMS

2007-08-14T18:25:00.000+07:00

Sumedang - Surabaya

terik temani siang
datang bulan temani nyeri
ibu tua penjaga warung temani aku
memori dingin pagi Sumedang temani jalanan sesak jelang sore Surabaya

lulu, 14.23, 29 Juli 2007

Perbincangan RA Kosasih dengan Beng Rahadian

sebuah ode mengalun sesore ini
nyanyian sang legenda kepada pewarisnya
indah, merdu, penuh warna
aku terdiam jadi saksi

lulu, 16.02, 5 Agustus 2007

Aku Menyerah

kepada malam-malam yang penuh penantian
kepada angan yang selalu kesiangan
bahkan kepada hari biasa yang terlalu biasa
aku menyerah...

lulu, 9.13, 7 Agustus 2007

'...'

ilusi itu melaju
lahap telan ide-ide kami
tanpa belas pancung logika kami dengan ego mereka
hingga luluh lantak
tapi kami masih punya hati
tak kan kami biarkan ia terampas
dan kami akan pergi bersama nurani
yang tak pernah bisa mereka dengar

lulu, 23.10, 13 Agustus 2007

Terlalu Banyak Kebetulan... Too Many Coincident

2007-08-03T15:15:00.000+07:00

Apa yang akan terjadi kalau terlalu banyak kebetulan terjadi pada kurun waktu berdekatan?
What's going to happen if there are many coincidents in one moment?

Apakah kita akan percaya bahwa ini hanya kebetulan belaka ataukah hal ini merangkai suatu fakta baru yang belum terungkap?
Will we believe it's just a coincident or will it lead us to uncover a new fact?

Kemana akan kita temukan fakta itu kalau yang kita punya hanyalah serangkaian kebetulan?
Where will we find that fact if what we have is just a series of coincident?

Apakah salah menyimpan kegelisahan ini?
Is it wrong to keep this anxiety?

Apakah salah mempertanyakannya?
Is it wrong to question it?

Apakah bisa kita berdamai dengan cara percaya bahwa ini hanyalah sekedar kebetulan?
Can we make peace by believing that this is just purely coincident?

Apakah seumur hidup kita hanya bisa percaya dan menerima?
Are we going to spend the rest of our life believing and accepting it?

lulu, at home, 15.30, August 1, 2007

Sembunyi

2007-07-23T17:52:00.000+07:00

aku dan dinding oranye ini
saling bertanya ada apa malam ini
sehingga gelisah menjadi-jadi
dari segala arah memeluk kami

mungkin hanya mata hatiku
yang tertutup oleh cemburu
saat bersama sepi menuai ragu
tak ada siapa yang mau merayu

lulu, goethe-institut jakarta, 17.56 wib, 23 Juli 2007

KONDE & EOS 2007

2007-07-09T08:47:00.000+07:00

So many things had happened for these last few weeks. My husband Beng and his Akademi Samali organization, were organizing the One Decade of Indonesian Comic Festival. I was, like always, making a documentation with my video camera. It is quiet a ride having a comic festival in the beach area of Ancol, in the North of Jakarta for 10 days. You just never know what kind of trouble or problem would occur during the event. It is not as predictable as making an event in the Center or South of Jakarta (which is where we're living now). Dealing with different kind of people, infrastructures and situations. Ancol is an amusement park with all venues for water activities, just like any other amusement park nearby the beach anywhere in the world. It is my childhood memory of holiday: swiming at the beach, kissing the sea gul in a show, riding roller coaster and of course the one that is no longer there: the drive-in cinema.

Anyway, I am now in the middle of my own event's preparation, the European Film Festival Europe On Screen 2007. And more to come in between and after: Boemboe Forum 2007 (Indonesian short filmmaker's forum) and the preparation of Appalshop project 2008 (Indonesia-US Youth Exchange Project). And then other small events where usualy we get involve one way or another. Since this last 6 months of 2007 is the semester of film festival or event, will be running from one event to another for sure.

What a life, don't you think? I am in the middle these 2 different worlds but very similar in the a way of struggling, dedication and love. Short Film and Comic are side by side in my life now. Never expected having a life like this. I just knew I would be the kind of person working in the art world which at first I thought it would be my first love: music. I left it almost 9 years a go, after struggling in it almost 9 years too. But I feel now this is it. You just have to be part of something right from very beginning and be loyal to it. It's how you can achive something real at the end.

Just want to express how grateful I am to be where I am now. And share it all to you, my friends...

lulu, goethe-institut jakarta, 09.10 am, july 9, 2007

Today's Moment

2007-06-05T15:34:00.001+07:00

the sun hide under the my sleepy eyes
invite along unstoppable day dream
and the endless drizzling rain singing
pouring softly on the roof of Jakarta
welcoming June like never ever before
I salute the gloomy-quiet-enchanting day
smiling at me, taking my breath away

lulu, at home, 15.20, June 5, 2007

Suam-suam Kuku

2007-05-31T15:06:00.000+07:00

tak beranjak sedari tadi
mengeluh dalam-dalam
mengumpat penuh racau
selundupkan sepotong puisi
curi-curi pandang ke dalam rasa
hangat pun memeluk usir beku

lulu, Goethe-Insitut Jakarta, 15.23, May 31, 2007

Another May

2007-05-22T10:28:00.000+07:00

another may surrounding us
as the memory of may'98 riot splash into our media
as the feeling of forgotten rain crash in our hot hot days
as the hidden gift for my love one stuck inside my closet
suddenly all of our friendship path emerging lively
when we celebrating your birth today

lulu, for Olin: happy birthday!, at home, May 22, 2007, 10.40

Andai andai

2007-05-02T00:05:00.000+07:00

melemah aku di sudut hati
menakar resah yang dinanti
rupanya hanya mau mimpi
kelana selalu ke seluruh negeri

lulu, at my home, 00.18, May 2, 2007

I am tired, therefor I am

2007-04-21T17:26:00.000+07:00

It's been a busy busy week this week. There's a French Film Festival with workhops, one of them was on Short Film Screening in Film Festivals which I was invited to come. At the same time my organization Boemboe should arrange the departure of 12 participants from 5 different organizations to join the media community based workshop in Appalshop, Whitesburg, Kentucky US.

I went to bed tired and woke up tired too. I feel like I should give myself a break. But I know it's just me with my unstoppable movement, damn...

Again, nothing really important issue here.

lulu, at my home, 17.13, April 21, 2007

On The Road Home

2007-04-03T23:08:00.000+07:00

waiting for the bus
waiting for dinner at home
waiting for the traffic jam to be over
waiting for my forgiveness to this city
waiting for me losing my human feeling
forever waiting

lulu, Jakarta, 20.21, April 3, 2007

Sekejap di Jogja

2007-04-02T11:26:00.000+07:00

ah, indahnya hidup
selonjor kaki
meniup harap
mata memicing
aku mengenang
sekejap di Jogja

lulu, at my home, 11.39, April 2, 2007

My Finland Memory

2007-03-18T21:17:00.000+07:00

I'd been traveling to Finland. Never forget the snow, look the same as I saw it 5 years a go when I was also visiting the Tampere Short Film Festival. So many poems I wrote during this traveling. More than my video and still photo session that I usually did in every far away traveling. Wish I can share it all with you. Maybe later. I usually only write here spotaneously, at exactly the time I post something new for this blog. Anyway, here the picture of me in the middle of snow. I always love it when I can took my picture by myself. It's always a challenge for me since asking someone else to take it will cause a damage to my memory of that particular place where I was at. Hope you can feel the snow...

lulu, my home in Jakarta, 22.14 on March 18, 2007

One Day at Makassar 2006

2007-02-24T08:45:00.000+07:00

one more day of traveling into the past. remember the feeling? it was so innocent. just watching some fishermen unloading their boat. buckets of fish are being carried away into the small harbour. the sun shined hard and made a glimmering lights covering their faces, bodies and smiles. children jumped into the water with joy. and i watched them carefully, tried to captured their spirit into my camera, which i know was impossible to do. well at least i tried to be part of the feast. celebrating life as life celebrating us...

one day from my missing mobile phone...

2007-02-23T15:40:00.000+07:00

i took a picture that stays much longer with me than my mobile phone...enjoy!

Angan Kesiangan

2007-02-23T15:26:00.000+07:00

bergerak dengan malam
tertatih-tatih dalam linu
membayangkan yang tak terbayangkan
rasanya masih jauh asa membumbung

lulu, at home, 15.29, February 23, 2007

The Connection Between the Busway and the Flood

2007-02-13T11:03:00.000+07:00

It's been almost no rain and hot these last two days in Jakarta. I was wandering through out the city by public bus last night. There's a new line of busway, where you should get in and out at certain spot that is off limits to traffic jam. But since there are only 8 busses for this long and winding line, it takes so much time to get into one. I'd rather taking the smaller bus, which might probably be hot or full or life risking with the way they drive. But it's always my way of remembering how similar I am with other people. The sense of togetherness is always part of our lives, the Indonesian.

Somehow the busway is like trying to get the same sense with the higher class of the Jakartan. They can pay almost double ticket price and should not lose their parfume smell in the crowded bus when they arrive in the office. So the bus with clean atmospheric and full AC inside, would be perfect for their daily life. That's why the Jakarta's governor built so many new busway lines through out Jakarta (which cost traffic jam all over the city since it taken one line off the street). The longest line in the world, he said. And almost all of them were flooded last week, so the busway is off for a few days. But at least the small station spots gave shelter to the flood victims, away from their flooded house. Like I said, it's the clean atmospheric that counts

Just me with my not-so-important comment about the new busway line in front of my road.

lulu, at home, 11.53 wib, February 13, 2007

February 2007

2007-02-04T21:56:00.000+07:00

We entered the month February 2007 with such disaster. About 1 month ago a plane missing and a big ship drawn into the open sea, hundreds are still missing. At the night of February 1st, the rain poured like crazy. The electricity went out and the next day half of Jakarta was drawn into flood1-4 meters. My house was safe but we are surrounded by the flood and the electricity went off until today.

It's quiet hard to share what most of Jakartans went through these last few days. I can't express it through this blog. Maybe it's just like having a snow strom for days in Europe and not be able to go anywhere or to do anything. Most of them just lost everything they have. There was nothing they could save since it happened in the middle of the night very fast. They just have to save themselves. Many of them are still trapped in their own houses, specially the elders and children.

It is sad and makes you feel gratefull just to be where you are, to have what you have and to feel what you feel...

lulu, Mampang home, 22.09, February 3rd, 2007

2007

2007-01-18T21:45:00.000+07:00

I know, I'm guilty of abandoning this blog for almost 3 months. Well, the situation is hard. Since my last posting here, there are 4 film festivals (3 in Jakarta, 1 in Jogja) I've attended or be part of actively. Also, there are filmmaker guests from Germany and USA whom I have a connection regarding their visit here. I'm also trying to finish a documentary and organizing an exhibition of German-Indonesian short animation this January. All these only in 3 months.

But anyway, I'm here now.

I am trying to gain my quality life this year 2007, hopefully I could somehow make it. I would like to read more books and have a quiet moment regularly. But these last few weeks or the first few weeks of 2007 I found out how impossible that is. So I feel like being drawn into this hopeless situation, between getting what I want and actually doing what I can in living my life. Maybe all those expectations you made at the end of the year for the next up coming year, is only for you to survive your plain (sometimes boring) life. And it's just the way it is.

Well, I will survive for sure :)

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 22.27 on January 18, 2007

Mudik

2006-11-02T16:01:00.000+07:00

Bandung, Cirebon, Kuningan are all in West Java
it's where the family of my husband lives
some of them I haven't met
so 15 of us went there on Idul Fitri last week
including 3 infants, my 'new' nephiews
in a car and two motorcycles
we traveled from Bandung to Cirebon
and from Cirebon to Kuningan
all in one day

along with thousands of other people
went back to meet and greet their families
also ask for "once a year" forgiveness
crazy traffick jam
long long hours drive
sleeping altogether in one big room
best food you ever taste or imagine existed
and brought it back as much as you can
in the spirit of mudik

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 16.25, November 2, 2006

Dear All

2006-10-11T12:14:00.000+07:00

I know you've been having a hard time posting a comment. I just changed the settings, so all of you can post a comment without having a blogpot yourself. Please let me know you're there :)

lulu, Oceanet, 12.02, October 11, 2006

24 Hour Comics Day in Jakarta!

2006-10-09T16:07:00.001+07:00

Wow, shooting a documentary about 13 comic artists trying to fight their own demons while making a 24 pages comic in 24 hours! That's what happened to me last Saturday.

After 21 hours I fell a sleep for 3 hours before making the final shoot on the last comic artist who keep on drawing, eventhough it was over 24 hours. There's no other feeling compare to what it likes to witness it through my mini dv camera. It's part exciting-amazed-exhauted feeling like.

If you want to know all about it, log on to http://komik24jam.multiply.com/ and see for yourself.

Just short this time, hope you grasp what I meant :)

lulu, Ocean Net, 16.10, October 9, 2006

Jakarta These Days

2006-10-04T12:09:00.000+07:00

It's really hot now days in Jakarta. Even hotter cause the Jakarta government develops special road for the busway lines all over the city. It's creating lots of traffic jams even during the hours that's not suposely be traffic jam.

I remember last year at the same month, heavy rain came almost every day. Now with the fast-month entering the eleventh day, the temperature really helps people to fight their own demond in a higher level. I lost so many liquid from my body during the day and got really tired at the end of the day after surviving a hot day in fasting condition. Yes, just drink a lot before the fast time, but how much water can you drink during the night?

Yeah, it's just me with my small-tiny-not so important subject to be disscused...

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 12.28, October 4, 2006

PMS

2006-09-25T14:16:00.000+07:00

sembilu di tengah gersang udara
celoteh tenggarai gejolak itu
hanya ingin diam dan mati rasa
hanya bisa peluk erat rasa sakit itu

lulu, Prima Net, 14.37, 25 September 2006

Rumahku

2006-09-24T16:22:00.000+07:00

berpulang ke rumah
dulu sangat jelas jalan menuju ke sana
kini perlahan kuak segala rahasia
bahwa aku tak pernah menghilang
hanya lupa mampir dan bercanda
bersama rumah hati renjana
sambut aku ramah

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 16.29, September 24, 2006

Jelang Ramadhan

2006-09-21T16:38:00.000+07:00

sudah kulupa rasa itu
pernah kupeluk rasa itu
seketika di masa lalu
kini aku merunduk
merendah kepada-Mu
mengharu untuk-Mu

lulu, MP Book Point, 16.46, 21 September 2006

Between Jogja, Makassar & Toraja

2006-09-18T10:21:00.000+07:00

It's been several days after I arrived back from traveling to Jogja, Makassar & Toraja. Felt like I was back from the 'world': long hours of traveling in the bus, airport view, meeting new people, eating strange-delicious food. My husband said to me, now you're complete because beside traveling around the world you're finally traveling inside Indonesia.

There's a special experience I would like to share with you... When I was acompanying Sebastian Winkels & Icang in shooting their video diary in Jogja, for the first time I saw Kalasan Temple. It was much smaller than Prambanan or the famous-huge-commercialized Borobudur temple, but it's the oldest one. Also it was 'hidden' in between people's houses and only few steps away from the main road. Somehow I became part of it, became part of some events took place centuries ago. You don't have to imagine it, you just need to sit and enjoy its silence, then you became part of it. You just knew it, somehow.

In Makassar I met nice people who just help you out without knowing who you are. Don't know some of their names, but still they make me want to go back there again. I love how they're really proud of their culture. I wish all Indonesians are like the Makassar people, still using their own language although some will also learn English, to become a tour guide for example. Besides all this sea food at its very best taste, I found that I still don't know anything about their culture. It's like all the things I read from books would be too small. I also went to Laeng Laeng, which are caves with paintings of pig and hands from the pre-history time. The stone hills surrounding us, trying to explain something with the bluest sky I've ever saw as their beautiful blanket.

Toraja on the other hand just suck you in with their highly demanding dedication to the dead. It's a cemetery tour only. It's how the dead still helping out the living people by letting strangers looking at them months or years after their death, in their sculptured-dirt coloured house. They even give you tours inside the cave where they burried their family. For me it's becoming too direct than my experience in Kalasan Temple where I could still keep the distance. Cause I am a stranger among them. But there no such thing in Toraja, everything's shared between them, including the expensive-huge-mass ritual for burrying the dead with a hundred buffalos as their meal.

I found out that the mistery of the past would stay as a mistery, no matter how good we are in researching them. You would never feel the feeling, the mood, the sense of the past. You can only feel its impression and sometimes its longing for its discovery by the present time, if you're lucky. They will be re-discovered again and again forever, I hope...

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 11.43, September 18, 2006

We meet again!

2006-09-14T12:54:00.000+07:00

I met Sebastian Winkels & Icang again in the airport to go to Jogja. They came from Makassar & Manado of Sulawesi island. I began to see that things got more complicated as the traveling continue to the next island. Since I began to be more relax over things, especially my work, I got more than what I expected before.

The screenings and discussions were nice, specially with the Jogjanes who used to say what they really think out in the open in a forum. The filmmaking part was quiet packed because we didn't have a lot of time outside the screening. But that was actually the main thing out of this project, how we could do a documentary about a journey into 6 cities in 3 islands of Indonesia while at the same time screen and discuss short films in 2 weeks? You don't know what will happen so you better be open about a lot of things. When we finally said goodbye, they were going to Aceh & Padang (Sumatera island) and I was going to Makassar for another project, I learnt that the project becoming more and more make sense. Our country is big with around 17,000 islands and it took event like this to connect them since not many of us have the fortune to travel within our own country.

Now, I'm waiting for another meeting with them back from Aceh & Padang. It's the end of the journey, but I feel like it's a begining of something big. We'll see...

lulu, Goethe-Institut Jakarta, 13.32, September 14, 2006

One Perfect Day

2006-09-03T16:55:00.000+07:00

Finally... a day with no obligations to do anything!
I have learnt that we need that kind of day at least once every two weeks. For someone like me who always have no office hours, it is important.

A day with lots of sleeping and 'nothing to do' activities
A day where the streets are more quiet with more space to walk by
A day where you can do whatever you want without time limits

One perfect day will balance the other crazy-hectic-over loaded days you had to go through.
Just like today...

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 17.12, September 3rd, 2006

'Till we meet again

2006-09-01T12:35:00.000+07:00

It's been a long time since I had the chance to write anything in here... In doing my work, I met some interesting people. Just when you thought you've knew it all, you met nice-humble-easy going people that makes your job much nicer. This kind of fortune that I find very rewarding in doing my work.

I am lucky considering what I do to earn my living is what I like the most. Besides screening short films and making a forum with the filmmakers last Sunday, I also got the chance to do some city walking for a video jurnal in Jakarta with 2 filmmakers from Malang, East Java and Berlin, Germany. They both have a mutual respect to each other and that makes this traveling a very interesting experience for me. I forgot how tired I am, jumping from one job to another since I am in the middle of making a documentary about jilbab while preparing and doing this film program.

At the end of the day when I can just lay down and find it hard to sleep because I was too tired, I will smile for the nice moment I spent with them. Their names are Icang (Malang) and Sebastian Winkels (Berlin). Now they are doing the same thing in Makassar and later Manado, in Sulawesi island without me. But we will meet again for the trip to Jogja. Looking forward to meet them again :)

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 12.45, September 1st, 2006

Ke-sibuk-an

2006-08-16T16:35:00.000+07:00

berlari meninjau waktu
memulai hari penuh jadwal
patah gapai biduk patuh
terseok dibawa pilu aral

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 17.48 wib, 16 Agustus 2006

People I've met part 2

2006-08-12T22:39:00.000+07:00

In Jogja, I also met Iman Budhi Santosa, a writer who is interested in the poetry anthology draft by me and my girl friends as we planned to published it ourself. We decided to ask him for an endorsement to be in our book after reading his writing on the current phenomenon of everybody (a.k.a. ordinary people) writing poetry and publish it themselves.

I was thinking of 2-3 sentences from him to be put in the book back cover, along with other endorsements when getting really surprised to have 9 pages instead. He said, there's something about the number 9 that he just had to write 9 pages of "letter" to us, 4 women he didn't know at all but got the chance to read these women's very personal feeling through their poetries. I was speachless and wishing my other 3 friends were here right now to help me response to it.

We ended up discussing the draft and poetry writing in general. At the time I haven't read his 9 pages "letter". But 2 days latter after reading and sending it to my girl friends then got their reactions, I know that we were lucky to have his "letter" to be put in the book. So I decided to invite him for lunch today, my 'almost' last day in Jogja. He brought his draft of phrases from all over Indonesia, complete with its original native languages and meaning. Again, I was speachless. We ended up discussing lots of things with him, specially his plan to publish his Indonesian phrase book.

Sometimes wonderful thing happens to me when I met such inspiring people and suddenly be able to communicate with them like there's no tomorrow...

lulu, Polaris Internet Jogja, 23.08, August 11, 2006

People I've met part 1

2006-08-11T10:36:00.000+07:00

Watching Sawung Jabo's music concert last Saturday at TIM Jakarta. It was quiet an experience. It's been a long time since I watched him perform. I always in touch with his direct-true lyrics. He's not as famous as the living legend Iwan Fals although they share the same stage with SWAMI a few years ago. But there's something about his song, his personality and his social awareness. Some kind of magic.

I've known him for years now. He's easy to get to know, very down to earth and if you meet him off stage, you'll never guest that he's a well known musician. Somehow we worked together a few days after the step down of Soeharto back in 1998. It's a music concert show celebrating the reformation through arts called BONGKAR. We managed to get funds, free sound system, lighting, video cameras, etc. to held a three days music concert filled with so many musicians who were volunterary join in. It's still my biggest pride to be part of this historical events in a important role during my music life era. Sawung Jabo took a leading man position and I was his back up in coordinating the crew, the program, the food, etc. He is now living in Australia with his lovely wife Susan Piper but always come back and forth to Indonesia. So I was honour when he came to my wedding day and sang 2 songs last January.

I managed to be in Jogja, the next city after Jakarta's concert. But since I am here for the Jogja Netpac-Asian Film Festival, I have to skip the concert for the festival. I was there during his GR and met him in Taman Budaya Yogya. I feel like meeting someone I've known for whole of my life, as if we're family...

lulu, Bintang Net, Jogja, 11.32, August 10, 2006

Serenade

2006-07-31T15:42:00.000+07:00

Nothing special, just me and my dream. I always dreaming of one day I will live in a quite place with 24 hours sound of nature. I know I think it might be impossible to acomplish, simply because me being a big city girl who always standing in the middle of a crowd. How can someone like me living in a much peaceful life?

My lecturer once told me, that if you are used to noisy surrounding when you're studying, then when you're in a quiet moment you might find it hard to concentrate to get what you have learnt to come out. It is probably my case, when I always complaining about my crowded-noisy-busy life, actually I may not that good in the reverse situation.

We always tempted by the thing we don't have and living the whole life figuring out how to get it. Maybe that what's my dream is all about. Maybe. See, I've told you before, nothing special :)

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 15.58, July 31, 2006

Main-main

2006-07-30T16:05:00.000+07:00

seputar ingin
perlahan peluk angin
lupakan luka
seolah hati terbuka
nikmati haru
walaupun terburu-buru

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 16.08, 30 Juli 2006

Blowing Up

2006-07-27T11:01:00.000+07:00

Going through so many in the last few days. Fighting my own demons, like always. I feel a lilttle bit crazy by my own feeling, it ends up blowing up in front of my face. At that time when you are with somebody, they get the efect.

Sometimes you just don't how you could collecting so many negative energy within you and when your hiding place is not enough for it, it'll just blow up. It is hard not to catch the negative vibe from suround you, that's what makes you human I know, but still...

I feel bad when it happens but at the same time it relieves me from heavy burden. But I don't want to again got it. Hope I can make it dissappear one day...

lulu, PrimaNet, 11.35, July 26, 2006

Waiting

2006-07-24T15:58:00.000+07:00

waiting
longing
is the day over soon?
into another day gone
without you
without you

lulu, Milenia Cafe Net, Pasar Festival, 16.23, July 24, 2006

Sendiri

2006-07-23T14:52:00.000+07:00

mengembara ke labirin pikir
menuang yang sudah aus
mengira tak ada lagi sisa tabir
menerka jalan akanlah lurus

menuai benih tumbuh ke akar
menjemput imaji liar
hingga terkapar
tak sadar

lulu, for Beng, Multiplus Buncit, 15.05, July 23, 2006

Back in Jakarta

2006-07-21T10:25:00.000+07:00

Crazy! I feel like being slapped in the face the minute I entered the city, by the air polution, the traffic and by the new things happened within 4 days I was away.

I asked myself, why do I love the city anyway?

But only when I was away from it I got the answer. By just looking at myself in the mirror, everything I do, every move I make, every gesture of my move, it's all coming to the fact that I am a Jakartan. The identity is clear and no more unanswered question left.

Once we sat and talked about this. It amazed my foreigner friend that I can say: I'm a Jakartan, when some people might say they're Javanese. Eventhough both my parents are Javanese, but I was born in Jakarta and spend most of my life here. It is hard not to be attached to it. We are so strange to each other but at the same time we are the same as these tiny objects circling the city day by day. This is something that I didn't find in New York. Maybe my 4 months there was not enough time to feel more that what I've felt, I don't know.

So many just like me here, maybe it what makes us the Jakartan. By some strange connection, longing for the hot-poluted-king of traffic Jakarta and not being able to resist the temptation of coming back here, no matter what...

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 11.00, July 21, 2006

Short Trip to Bali

2006-07-19T10:33:00.000+07:00

I was scheduling lots of meeting for this week when I found out that I could come to Bali with Beng. So there I was, packing things in a rush and re-scheduling everything before flying away to Sanur, Bali.

It is hard for me to take a real vacation, something I never done for years and years. When I did some travelings, it's always about doing some projects and in between stealing some time to relax. But now, I payed for everything myself, something I never done. A vacation is a luxurous thing for me, I guess. Too many things to be done and so little time to do it.

Now, on the third day, I realize that I should try to calm down. Whatever important things out there could wait for 3 days postpone. I should not plan my day here and just go with the flow. Amazing how such a tiny change can re-charge your life...

The tsunami in West Java and earthquake in Sudirman street Jakarta yesterday were the only things that influenced my guilty feeling being here far from it. But many believes, Bali would be next since it is facing directly to the South Sea. I don't know, I hope not. Sanur is still very quiet comparing to Kuta after the second Bali Bomb, everything from hotels to gift shops and restaurants, the income is droping into 60%. Imagine how welcoming they are to me, a local tourist, whom usually comes second after the foreigner tourist.

Meet some nice environment activies here in Hotel Santai/Fair Trade Outlet of PPLH Bali. They really give me hope that all the wrong things in Indonesia are actually being corrected step by step by their humble activities. For me, they are the lights in this dark universe.

lulu, Fair Trade Outlet Sanur, 11.44 WITA, July 19, 2006

Hari Libur

2006-07-19T10:25:00.000+07:00

sepakat menjelang sore
mendadak songsong hore
terbang memikat suasana
melewati pesisir renjana
berjalan menghitung pasir
menangkap potongan suvenir
hanya tersisa aku
bebas termangu-mangu

lulu, Sanur Bali, 11.23 WITA, July 19, 2006

Pasrah

2006-07-16T12:07:00.000+07:00

pecah
terbuncah-buncah
bagai disengat lebah
hingga patah
aku telah
pasrah

lulu, PrimaNet Kemang, 12.12, July 16, 2006

Sembilu

2006-07-13T15:54:00.000+07:00

serunya tualang
sepinya malam
seiring sembilu
jumpa mengharu
hingga nanti
pisah lagi

lulu, Multiplus, 15.53, July 13, 2006

Jogja part 2

2006-07-09T09:37:00.000+07:00

Yesterday I found myself in the middle of every film events that would take place in Jogja starting next month. Somehow they all contacted me and asked for Indonesian short films. And somehow I said yes to almost all of them. So many things happened in Jogja post the earthquake last May.

After meeting with people I do work with and friends, I decided to lost myself in the middle of "Shoping". It's a place next to Taman Budaya Jogja (= Jogja Cultural Complex) where old and new books are sold. But it's not the same anymore after the local government rebuild it into more ordered place. Less good old books, I guess. The new surprise for me is the new Taman Pintar (= Smart Park) right next to it. It's for free and especially made for children complete with children amusement park. And not far from it you could find a giant screen spesially installed in the middle of "Tugu Serangan 1 Maret" (= March 1st Attack-during the war-Monument). It's for a live broadcast of the World Cup off course! Also sponsored by a product that put their banners all over the streets passing through the monument. Bizzare situation, since I walked through these places after watching contemporary music performance in Jogja Gamelan Festival inside the Taman Budaya. How could all these things happening in the same day and each of them got a huge audience. Always something for everybody here in Jogja!

If you love peace and lots of smile, you will surely find it here in Jogja...

lulu, Jogja, 10:02, July 9, 2006

Aku di Kotamu

2006-07-09T08:48:00.000+07:00

seputar-putar kotamu
liat bergerak dijemput sana sini
hingga rasuk ke celah-celah gigi
kadang kaki enggan berhenti melangkah
buku-buku setengah harga lumat dicari-cari mataku
menyangka kamu baru melewatiku
naik sepeda motor

seringnya aku seorang diri
memetik senyum teduh di mana-mana
di sisi gang saat memilah beras
di atas becak-becak tak terkayuh
di rayuan ampuh penjual asesori manik-manik
di angkringan sambil sama-sama menyeruput teh
di depan tambalan retak-retak dinding rumah
...
aku tak ingin pernah lelap
tapi tak berdaya disergap lelah

lulu, Jogja, 00:00, 9 Juli 2006

Jogja part 1

2006-07-08T09:27:00.000+07:00

Yesterday I came to Jogja for the first time after the earthquake. I didn't have the courage to use my camera because it was already happened in some cases that people from outside Jogja doing a "disaster tour" in the middle of their destroyed houses and insulted the victims. It caused the local people gone mad to them and even to the TV crew.

Things have gone normal and they don't need any pity. They just need your support to build their lives back, standing on their own feet again.

lulu, Jogja, 9.30, July 8, 2006

Sale

2006-07-06T16:25:00.000+07:00

it's a show of commercial bilboards
glimering lights specially made for illusion
giant super mall advertised by a well known model
surrounding the streets of Jakarta
have you seen this?
have you been there?
sale your public space
sale your land
sale your soul
...

lulu, Multiplus Buncit, 16.37, July 6, 2006

Buku Buku Buku

2006-07-05T11:17:00.000+07:00

Me and Beng were in Pesta Buku (= Book Fair) yesterday. Found this interesting publishing called Resist from Jogjakarta. They don't believe in Copyrights so they translate and publish books from aboard which contain any resistance against global-capitalistic-established idea, without any permission from its original publisher. I found also Indonesian books with rare subjects, like a photography book about social resistance of common people in Indonesia, who's usually never recognized by the public. Or comic magazine "Subversi" (= Subversive) with main theme about poverty that only got published once in 2004 since the people behind it never find one united voice of how to keep publishing it. Resist was the most interesting out of all other big publishers there.

Resist also produced poster of their books, pin and T-Shirt. Off course it is not visualize just a book cover but more into the main illustration and its provocative title, such as: "Tidak ada sekolah untuk orang miskin" (= There's no school for poor people). It reminded me of similar movement when I was in Holland back in 2003. It was a Next 5 Minutes Festival, held in De Balie, Amsterdam. Where there's no trade except barter and screening of films about the movement. Also in the streets of Sidney, Australia, where I bought a peace sign pin or a simple Sunday morning bazzar in Canberra.

I'm thankful that there's such movement. Makes me believe that some of us really believe in making the world a better place to live, regardless which way they chose to achieve it. I wish I always there to support them, even though I'm not really part of them.

lulu, Prima Net, 11.51, July 5, 2006

Chose your life

2006-06-30T19:25:00.000+07:00

You might recall the film Trainspotting, which became huge among my friends. Love that lines when the main cast mentioned about chosing your life. I never really thought about it until today. Sitting alone at the porch, looking at the sunset without the sun (common view in Jakarta) and suddenly connected to what I used to think in that kind of moment, which is rare these days.

I chose my life to be as free as I could. I chose not to want more than what I believe I could achieve. If I know I want more, I will put it in my dream file. So one day it could come true but if it's not than I can still have it as a dream. I have so many dreams and some of them really came true. It's become bigger and bigger but at the same time I'm becoming more and more realistic about everything.

Yes, I chose my life path. Like I chose Beng to be my husband. Like I chose not to drive a car. Like I chose to be pragmatis sometimes. Like watching big Hollywood movies sometimes. Like I chose to share my thoughts to you all. Never question it after you made your decision. Just go along with it whatever it may be.

lulu, Ocean Net, 19.41, 30 June 2006

Beranda Senja

2006-06-30T19:12:00.000+07:00

tenang menyelimuti
bersandar di beranda sendiri
senja yang tak jelas warnanya
menggelap seperti perlahan memanggil malam

aku menunggumu
ditingkahi serbuan nyamuk
lena oleh hening yang membisu
tak lelah sebab telah kutunggu kau seumur hidupku

lulu, Ocean Net, 19.19, 30 Juni 2006

Old House

2006-06-29T18:04:00.000+07:00

A few years ago I found this nice old house on the HOS Cokroaminoto Street in the elite area of Menteng in the Centre of Jakarta. And last yearI saw some people started to torn down the house. I was sad as I witnesed another old building disappearing in Jakarta. I always sad to see a new building site. Like losing some sort of history which contained in the old building. The next time I passed, the whole house was gone. I suspected it replaced by another new house with stupid architecture like most of new houses in the elite area in Jakarta. People just build luxurious-unfriendly-fort alike house, like they are in the middle of Europe or something.

Time goes by. Since I didn't pass the street for quite some time by walking as I used to and no old house for me to look at, I forgot about it. Today I decided to walk just 30 minutes before the sunset with my heavy books. It is hard to walk on the sidewalk of Jakarta, especially during the day: too hot, too many pedlers or sometimes the motorcycle steals it away. I won't let this chance go by and carried the heavy books around. I couldn't help to look at the site where the old house used to be. And there were bushes everywhere, like a deserted land. There was nothing. I just couldn't believe my eyes and started to feel the books heavier than before.

I just wish I never spotted the old house there... Or is it my fortune to have ever saw it there?

lulu, Multiplus, 18.44, June 29, 2006

...

2006-06-25T11:55:00.000+07:00

cintaku merambat
memelukmu ke segala arah
seperti tak ada lagi rasa
kecuali resah gelisah
apakah aku cukup untukmu?

lulu, for my Beng, Cafnet Kemang, 13.52, 25 Juni 2006

Life is what you want to see

2006-06-20T16:02:00.000+07:00

Sometimes I feel so awful about the reality in front of me. And there's no turning back to make it right. I feel dizzy and want to blame someone else for it. Or blame whatever I can think of. Then at the end of the day I realized, it's all because the way I look at things arround me.

Life always play tricks on you and how you react to it is depend on the way you see it. If you just want to see problems, so what's new? Problems are everywhere. It's part of life itself. You can deal with it or let it eat you alive.

I prefer to see life positively and refuse any negative aura get in the way. I used to see the negative side all the time because of my work in entertainment world in Indonesia, which means things will always never goes the way you planned it and the changing (or you may call it 'problem') could burst out of no where. You just have to be ready for anything and that's why I always had the worst scenario I can think of. But this attitude had taken myself and slowly effecting my life.

It is not as easy as I am writing it now but I want to try. Life is already full of problems, missfortunes, troubles, surprizes, etc., so why make it worst?

lulu, Multiplus Net, 16.30 pm, June 20th 2006

Blunder

2006-06-19T14:49:00.000+07:00

sehelai daun melayu
berpusing riuh rendah
lengkap sudah deritanya
tak kuasa menahan angin
tak mungkin kembali ke dahan
tak mampu bendung kesia-siaan

lulu, OceanNet, 15.25 pm, June 19th 2006

Musim-Musim

2006-06-18T13:15:00.000+07:00

liar musim lalu
kering musim kini
ruang itu telah kembali
seolah tak pernah ada
musim-musim itu

lulu, Buncit Home, 02.50 am, June 18, 2006

Yesterday

2006-06-16T11:29:00.000+07:00

it's all started with a dream
a dream that penetrate deep into my heart

In my dream
I save a little child in her shattered house
held her into my arms and take her away
from bomb explotion, earthquake, some kind of disaster
she's crying because she's hurt and looking for her mother
I try to calm her down with whispering words
she calm down
but I never dare to check her wound in her back
so I never know how bad it is before I wake up
Yesterday, I tried to figure out why
I don't have the courage to see her wound in my dream
I regret it the whole day

until I cried along the yellow road
until it keeps me up in the late night
until I write this today and feel cold

I just don't see the little child's wound in my dream

lulu, Buncit Home, 02.10 am, June 16th 2006

Aku Tunggu

2006-06-12T11:54:00.000+07:00

juta-juta hati
lewat memerah
patahkan semangat
walau tak sampai mati
mata membasah
dipeluk sampai hangat

aku tunggu kau hadir
bersemayam nyaman
hingga selesai dalam rahim

lulu, Multiplus, 11.59 am, 12 Juni 2006

Global Friends

2006-06-11T11:14:00.000+07:00

I have friends everywhere I go. And I did some heavy travelings between 2003-2005. I don't know why it's all happened every 2 months in 2 years as if I have it planned. From Holland, Germany, US, Australia until Singapore, Japan and Korea. It is not easy now that I seatle down. Sometimes they email or sms me and made my day brighter of their warmth as if there's no distance between us.

I remember those feelings of again trapped in an airport somewhere and not knowing why was I there at first place. My friends that I met along the way kept me for going insane. Never forget them but it is not easy when you are starting a new life with someone you love and just stay in one city for good.

Yesterday I tried to contact them all to visit this simple blog. I want to thank them somehow. Some of them are already sent their reactions this morning. I know by heart we always be friends no matter how far we all apart.

Thank you, friends!

lulu, MP Book Point, 11.37 am, June 11th 2006

My Rollercoaster Ride

2006-06-10T10:38:00.000+07:00

So much has been going on these past few weeks. An Earthquake in Jogja, the disturbing Darwin's Nightmare documentary, the crazyness from the opening of World Cup. I just couldn't believe how all these combine in 2 weeks!

I feel we have to be aware all the time to face different things happening one after another. Like it meant to be placing us in the fast roller coaster, wether we like it or not. It's a test to our insanity. You might survive the tragedy because it happens far far away from you or not so far but well, in the same island, but you still have to survive the wave effect. You can't hide from it. It's part of this modern-global-fast life you live in.

At the end, I feel lucky because I could still feel this and not see it just as one of those headlines in the front page of a newspaper. To feel, how worst it could be, still a lot better than being numb to all your suroundings. Like once I experienced in the streets of New York 3 years ago, how this "mind you own business" attitude just driving me nuts. Maybe I experienced it to know the worst thing that could've happen in human race.

Somehow I am still feel guilty for not doing more or witnessing so much thing is being wasted for nothing...

lulu, Satunet Duren Tiga, 11.10 am, June 10, 2006

Darwin's Nightmare

2006-06-03T14:12:00.000+07:00

Two days ago I watched a film in French Film Festival at TIM. Le Cauchemar de Darwin or Darwin's Nightmare is a documentary about people of Lake Victoria, the second largest lake in the world, located in Tanzania. I was shocked and I believe it changed my perspective on Europe for good. Don't realize how one continent can cause real damage to other continent. It reminds me of what has been happening in Papua, in my own country. But why it took me a documentary about a country far far away from me to make the connection? I don't know. Maybe because it's easier for us to sympathy for something with such distance from us than the thing close to or within us.

It is indeed a nightmare for everybody. And I think I will shake the hands of the director if I ever come across him someday. Maybe not in Europe since I don't think I will ever go back there. Just to congratulate him of what his documentary capable of, at least for me. Hope I'm not the only one...

lulu, MP Book Point, 14.25 pm, June 3rd 2006

Hilang

2006-06-03T14:10:00.000+07:00

aku kehilangan ruangku
mungkin memang salahku
meninggalkannya
tak pernah kembali
tak pernah
ia telah mati

lulu, Wr.Buncit, 9.44 am, 31 Mei 2006

Sabtu Kelabu

2006-05-30T15:03:00.000+07:00

dua hari lumpuh
haru yang membeku
jogja, aku luruh

lulu, MP Book Point, 15.11 pm, 30 Mei 2006

Jeda Bersama

2006-05-24T15:28:00.000+07:00

ini jeda memang ada
lepas segala jelang semesta
spontan rasa buang nestapa
kenapa pula tak mereda
bila hati meruang ria
lupa lupa
lupa semua

lulu, Multiplus, 15.46 pm, 24 Mei 2006
tentang bersama di pedalaman Cibubur

Bad Day

2006-05-22T15:12:00.000+07:00

What is a bad day?

It's when you make a stupid mistake and ended up hurting the person you love. And at the same day you experienced this: when you've got the chance to meet the people who love and support you all your life but then found out it's actually the chance to make you feel guilty for succesfully live your own life independently, away from them..

That's what I felt yesterday.

Today I'm trying to make it a better day, since it is my life and I'm the one who must live in it, not others. But you never know when the bad day will strike you. You just have to believe after the worst happen to you, things always gets better.

It's cloudy and grey out there but it is a better day for me. Hope it is for you too.

lulu, MP Book Point, 15.28 pm, 22 May 2006
Happy Birthday, Olin!

Sunset in Jakarta

2006-05-17T12:20:00.000+07:00

Did you know, how wonderful the sunset hidden behind buildings of Jakarta? As I was walking yesterday from Goethe-Institut to TIM at Cikini, I found it out. The colour of that few hours before sunset. It's hard to spot the sun in Jakarta. The sky should be clear, which is almost never. You should put yourself in a clear horizon spot. One of them is the Kuningan bridge. But how long will you have time to be there? What is the right time and moment with such a short time passing the busy bridge?

But I think the beauty is when you don't know when and suddenly you're just there during the moment. Not knowing and then knowing it in the split second, I think that makes it a treasure. And I won't let it slip away in this cruel world... Will you?

lulu, Prima Net, 12.29 pm, May 17, 2006

Terbang

2006-05-10T15:35:00.000+07:00

diam-diam mengambang
kadang berterus terang
namun lepaslah meradang
lelah pun menerjang
melayu timpang
inginnya hanya terbang

lulu, PrimaNet, 15.40, 10 Mei 2006

Mula-mula

2006-05-08T11:19:00.000+07:00

hanya mencari
sesudah itu sendiri
catatan pun dimulai

lulu, Ocean Warnet, 11.12 pm Jakarta 8 Mei 2006